Hello everyone! I hope this tenth week of quarantine life is treating you all magnificently and you’re all staying safe. Now that we’ve dispatched of the pleasantries, I’d like to jump right into the topic at hand. Name, Image, Likeness. Those three words form the acronym NIL and if it weren’t for this whole Coronavirus pandemic, it’d be the talk of the town. Am I here to discuss the merits and pitfalls behind the NIL? Hell no. That’s boring. There’s enough echo chambers on the interwebs where people shout their player monetization takes into. No, the reason I’ve fired up the ol’ Photoshop machine is to pose a more interesting question: What are the potential marketing opportunities out there for Irish players to capitalize off their name, image or likeness? Obviously I’ve got a few ideas of my own for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish...
Ian Book x Barnes and Noble.
A part of me almost wants to apologize for the low hanging fruit that is Ian Book teaming up with a store that sells books. But frankly that’s why I had to do it. Barnes and Noble is out there trying to prove they are more than just books, Ian is out there to prove he is more than just a game manager. The fit just FEELS right. The tagline for this one:
“Some Books can’t be judged based on their cover. This Book won’t be judged based on your coverage.”
Kurt Hinish x Brawny
Look, I get it ad execs. You’re always trying to mix it up. First you shaved the Brawny Man. Then you gender swapped him. But it’s time for you to return to your roots. Kurt Hinish isn’t a flashy football player. Brawny isn’t a flashy paper towel. But dammit they are going to clean up every goddamn mess you can throw at em. Which leads me to the slogan:
“Kurt knows all about cleaning up messes before they reach the edge, that’s why he uses Brawny.“
Braden Lenzy x Jimmy John’s
This was the source of my inspiration. After I had donned my Mad Max Road Warrior outfit and ventured out into the apocalyptic landscape of southeast Michigan, I spotted a Jimmy John’s billboard advertising their mantra freaky fast delivery. After avoiding the teeming hordes of the infected, I got to thinking... Braden Lenzy is freaky fast, he’d be a perfect spokesman for the sandwich shop! The catch phrase for this one would be:
“Freaky Fast just got Freaky Faster.”
Robery Hainsey/Liam Eichenberg x ADT Home Security
The bookends that were among the nations best in pass protection, on a line that allowed just 16 sacks all season, Hainsey and Eichenberg hawking home security is a no brainer. Their marketing motto is also a no brainer:
“When it comes to protection, we do it by, and for, the Book.”
Shaun Crawford x AARP
Shaun Crawford has stepped into that Old Man Kap role as the senior statesman on the Irish roster and has really embraced it. To me there is nothing more enduring than someone who can poke fun at themselves and the Golden Mongoose has become one of the players I root for the most. Fun fact, he originally wore #14 as a freshman, which happens to be the year he committed to play for the Irish(committed on 6/15/2014). The sixth year senior’s tagline as a spokesman for AARP:
“Inflation may have lessened the value of the dollar since my freshman year but it hasn’t lessened the value of this nickel.”
Kyle Hamilton x Home Run Inn Pizza
Kyle Hamilton is the best right? Right. Home Run Inn Pizza is the best frozen pizza right? Well most of us agree here at One Foot Down. Maybe not Josh:
Libelist comments aside, here’s the catch phrase for one Mr. Hamilton in regards to Home Run Inn:
“They say you are what you eat, and if I’m gonna be the GOAT then I gotta eat the GOAT. Home Run Inn, the greatest frozen pizza of all time.”
So now I leave it up to you all, what are player x brand mashups do you want to see? Drop your mashups in the comments below and I’ll do a follow up of the ones I like the best and can feasibly do!