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Help Us Roast Notre Dame Football, But Don’t Let It Distract You From the Fact that They Went 4-8

Give us your best Notre Dame football jokes and roasts in the comments section, and we’ll all try to lighten up and relish the hate before we begin another college football season

NCAA Football: Notre Dame at Southern California Matt Cashore-USA TODAY Sports

Folks, it’s time we had an open discussion about a very touchy topic for us Notre Dame football fans.

The Notre Dame Fighting Irish went 4-8 last year.

I would say you don’t need reminding of that, as I’m sure you remember it vividly, and because tons of people are actively reminding all of us about it.

Seriously, they keep reminding us.

A lot.

But every time someone makes a joke about Notre Dame football’s inadequacy on social media, scores of ND fans seem to grow extremely defensive, and most of us never, ever, ever seem to take the jokes lightly.

I know we all have a laundry list of problems we see in the football program - I’m right there alongside a lot of you in terms of acknowledging major issues with the head coach, administration, ticket prices, etc. It’s frustrating and disappointing and angering to see Notre Dame football in the position it’s in currently.

Notre Dame v USC Photo by Jeff Gross/Getty Images

Because that’s the reality, though, I think we all need a good helping of humor to help us put things in perspective, power through these dark times, and enjoy the mountain of comedy being produced around just a few basic jokes at our expense.

Specifically, the jokes about Notre Dame’s 4-8 record (and about Manti Te’o’s unfortunately-fake ex-girlfriend and about Rudy and about Brian Kelly’s purple screaming-face, etc.) can be tired and uninspired (rhyme unintended) if executed in the same fashion every time.

But when people get creative, those jokes can still be very funny, in my extremely-should-be-more-humble opinion.

And if I know the readers of SB Nation, I’m very certain you can get creative, so here’s what we’re going to do to help all of us sad, mad ND fans have a little fun despite the tough year — or maybe tough 7+ years? — we’ve had:

  • You all will compose, in the comments section of this article, your absolute best roasts of Notre Dame, especially in relation to the football team. You better get creative with them...I’m expecting to legitimately LOL and maybe even LMAO or ROFL at your jokes, folks (rhyme intended)
  • The One Foot Down staff (along with all other commenters) will review the comments and give our approval/disapproval of the best roasts via the “recs” function
  • I vow to personally write a follow-up article featuring the best ones and what I loved about them and why no one should take offense to them

It’s time Notre Dame fans lightened up and enjoyed being the “heel” of college football. If you don’t love ‘em, you probably hate ‘em, and it’s been that way ever since the Irish became a national power.

Just because the team is no longer the top dog in terms of performance doesn’t mean we as fans can’t relish being the Cowboys, Yankees, Lakers, or Duke basketball of college football, though. It’s better than being completely forgotten, without a doubt.

So, I implore all Irish fans to embrace that we’re different than other schools. We’re arrogant about our excellent academics and we cling stubbornly to the much more fun football memories of the past, when we were the best of the best. We’re also fans of a team who failed to beat Duke, Navy, or a 3-9 Michigan State team all in the same season, and of a program that has had multiple incidents of academic dishonesty as well as a few very publicized run-ins with the law...

Notre Dame v Michigan Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images

Embrace all of that, and realize that until some things change, our football program is in pretty ridiculous shape, and thus it deserves a lot of the ridicule it receives.

Let’s at least have fun with it. It’s time for a good, old-fashioned roast.