I would like to offer my sincerest apologies to you, dear, devoted reader, for I, your humble Notre Dame blogger did not watch the game between the Notre Dame Fighting Irish and Miami-Florida Hurricanes this Saturday. I know that you, dedicated fan, tune in every Tuesday to read my wise, astute, and clever musings on Notre Dame’s Saturday outings, but alas, I have failed you. You see, this weekend I was in my second favorite college town: Clemson, South Carolina.

After a long, grueling day of tailgating, which included a hearty apple cider spiked adult beverage and a Low Country Boil, I meandered to a bar on College Ave where I was hoping to catch the 8pm kickoff. Upon my arrival, the barman turned on the Mississippi State-Alabama finale (What a game!) and on the other television, Missouri-Tennessee.

I tried to ask him to turn on ABC, but you see, in South Carolina no one gives a flying shit about Notre Dame or Miami! At least, not at this bar.

Having seen the conversation since the game, I will not rewatch it, for I value my mental health.

GOOD

Here is the Low Country Boil I ate:

BAD

Here’s some tweets:

IRISH

Not to brag again, but I didn’t watch the game so take these observations with a very salty grain of salt.

IN. DEPTH. ANALYSIS.

The best part about writing this weekly recap is getting the unsolicited opinions of friends and family every week. Here is a very thoughtful observation by former ND Baseball Captain @Notre_James.

...take away the fact we played scared and let the moment get the best of us, our play calling was bad for the first time in a long time. Lots of east west, slow developing run plays against a fast defense. Would’ve loved to see a little more north South action.

So there you have it. This could be totally true or total bullshit, again I have no idea. Roast James in the comments if you dare.

No, let’s not fire Brian Kelly

C’mon y’all. The record is 8-2. EIGHT AND TWO. I’m still waiting for someone to name a LEGITIMATE head coach candidate who 1. Notre Dame would actually hire and 2. Actually wants the job. ‘Til then, your complaints are just a waste of complainin’. If the Irish finish up the season 10-2 I, personally, will be very happy. Even 9-3 would give us a nice little bowl game and a worthy opponent.

You know who wishes they were 8-2 right now? Florida State. That’s who. You know who else? 6/7 teams in the SEC East. 8-2 is a perfectly respectable record after 10 games. Plus, we fucking annihilated USC a few weeks ago, people forget that.

Some happier news

Between this, the brand new stadium, and the Smashburger, students these days have it all. (Smashburger rosemary fries are the goat)

In Conclusion,

1. Football is stupid anyway.

2. Notre Dame basketball is undefeated.

Photo by Michael Hickey/Getty Images

3. I apologize again for failing you. I know that you all wait with bated breath every Tuesday evening to see the insights and observations that you can’t find anywhere else on this vast, godless abyss that we call the world wide web. I promise to never disappoint you again. But if I do, just know it was probably for a good reason. Apple cider vodka was a good reason.

Go Irish, beat Midshipmen. plz