Twitter, as my friend Tim O’Connor once said, is the world’s greatest sports bar. My gameday tradition is to keep a computer nearby and enjoy the hilarious and sometimes insightful commentary from Notre Dame Fighting Irish fans.
Here are five tweets I saw this week that I enjoyed immensely — and I think you will too. We call this segment TWITTERMANIA. Welcome to Week 6.
Defensive back Darqueze Dennard and tight end Tyler Eifert were former rivals who are now teammates on the Cincinnati Bengals. Why is Denard, a Michigan State alum, wearing a Notre Dame shirt? Oh, I imagine false confidence in his Spartans besting the Eifert’s Irish this year.
Denard was part of Michigan State’s #NoFlyZone. You know who beat that squad?
(Photo illustration: @ndtex)
The FBI tip line for NCAA corruption has just been opened.— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) September 26, 2017
I'd pay to listen to this machine in the coming days.
FBI, 3 days from now: "Please stop calling us about the Bush Push, Notre Dame fans." https://t.co/D87Y1NOGlr— Matthew Sprague (@MSprague518) September 28, 2017
Allow me to be clear: Darren Rovell will never have one of the five best tweets, as long as I’m running #Twittermania. However, people making snarky jokes about Rovell’s tweets are totally in the running. Congrats, Matthew. If we weren’t already certain the 2005 USC Trojans were corrupt, I may have called about Reggie Bush and Matt Leinart because they are CHEATING BASTARDS.
In-game gags are the hardest to pull off, so I have immense respect for anyone that can loop video, marry sound to it and turn it around quickly for our amusement. Kudos to Amy, who could not find the perfect song, but found a tune that definitely complements whatever the hell Brian Kelly was doing in this moment.
If someone did “Thriller” with this video, please send it along.
If you’ve followed Jeremy Hiler (@jjhiler) on Twitter, you may recall his family’s 15-month effort to adopt two adorable boys, Max and Judah, from the Democratic Republic of the Congo. Max and Judah have been with the Hiler family for almost two years now.
On Saturday, 7-year-old Judah went to his first game. I reached out to his dad to see how it went for this second grader.
“His favorite part was the 52 push-ups that he got to do at the end with his Uncle @eshiler and me lifting him up,” Jeremy wrote. “He’s hooked and can’t wait to go to another game. ... It was a struggle to get him home from Congo. That’s for sure. He’s thriving and Irish through and through. (Although he may be more of a basketball fan than football).”
If Judah grows up to be 7-foot-2 like another person from his home country, I’m sure Mike Brey will be very interested in Judah in, say, a decade.
Are we certain that the South Bend Tribune’s Tyler James hasn’t borrowed a DeLorean, 1.21 gigawatts of power, traveled to the future and purchased a Grays Sports Almanac? When I make predictions, it’s something lame like 35-28. Sometimes I get crazy and add field goals. Tyler may never hit his prediction again, unless he’s got the Almanac. (Keep it away from Biff!)
...and something unrelated to college football or Notre Dame that I just found funny
The collective cultural amnesia about basically any & all plot details of AVATAR, the biggest movie ever, will never not be hilarious to me— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) October 2, 2017
I tried this in my office. “Tell me about what happens in Avatar.”
Co-worker #1, claims to have seen the movie recently: “There’s this guy. And he’s in this pod. And he dies. Or he kills someone.”
Co-worker #2, also watched it somewhat recently: “And his legs don’t work. So he dreams about blue people that fly. And he wants to be there because his legs work there. But he can’t be there.”
Co-worker #1: “And there’s a tree. And it it’s like the source of all life. ... And someone gets really mad that the guy kills someone he wasn’t supposed to kill.”
Co-worker #3, hasn’t seen it in years: “I can’t really remember anything except blue people.”
Yes, co-worker #3. I feel you.