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The Anti-Preview: Notre Dame VS Miami

Notre Dame football... something, something... Catholics VS Convicts... something, something... Mark Richt has complete control.

Hyundai Sun Bowl -  Notre Dame v Miami
It’s all hugs and kisses anymore.
Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

No one thought the Notre Dame Fighting Irish would be in this bad of shape after their first seven games. No one. Not even the biggest hater alive would have suggested that Notre Dame would be 2-5 and staring down the barrel of one of the worst seasons in memory.

Anti-Preview The wonderful @phillykelly

There really isn’t much else to say. Really.

Catholics VS Convicts? Really? Did Miami become a Catholic school? Referencing this phrase this week and not placing it in the proper context of a game that was played 28 years ago, is really ridiculous. Really. How many arrests has Notre Dame had in the past 7 years? Something about glass houses or lines in the sand or prostitutes- no, still not talking about...

Miami

After getting off to a hot start and rolling off wins against Florida A&M, Florida Atlantic, Appalachian State, and Georgia Tech, the Miami Hurricanes hit the side of a mountain with three straight losses at the hands of Florida State, North Carolina, and Virginia Tech. In all three of those losses the Canes have not scored more than 19 points.

This is not the matchup we had all hoped it would be just a few short moths ago.

What Should We Be Drinking?

With Cuba just 90 miles away and a fresh viewing of 13 Days tucked away in my head, this week is going to be full of island fun. It all starts with a drink. This Mojito, as legend would say, was the favorite drink of one of our favorite writers; Ernest Hemingway. It actually wasn’t- but that ain’t stopping me this week.

What Should We Be Eating?

Sticking with our geographical theme and knowing what is just plain good and heaven for the mouth... the Cubano (kind of).

What Should We Be Wearing?

Well, you can’t drink mojitos and eat cubanos while wearing denim overalls and plaid flannell. YOU CAN’T SIT HERE! Ladies and gentelmen, forget any chance the temperature doesn’t exactly call for it, and show off your fashion sense. Show off your sexy sense.

How Gold Seat people feel about this game.
via Twitter

What’s The Best Thing About This Game?

The best thing about this game is that it comes right after a bye week. The best thing doesn’t have anything to do with past meetings, or something called a rivalry- it’s that the bye week is over and here is a game. Did Brian Kelly make enough adjustments? Can the season be salvaged (even if it is still a clunker)? We’re going to find out a lot, and that’s what the best thing is- we get a map for the rest of the season- or at least some directions from the gas station clerk with the crystal meth problem.

5 Reason’s To Hate Miami

Here is the one place we can look to history for answers. (We could have had 55).

1. Pig-Faced Satan
2. 3rd And 43
3. 58-7
4. Bitching about a non-fumble
5. The Rock

Shamrock Stars

NCAA Football: Michigan State at Notre Dame Matt Cashore-USA TODAY Sports

Dexter Williams. Let’s see... Adams isn’t 100% and Tarean Folston is healthy and looked great in limited use against Stanford. That TOTALLY means that the arrow points to Williams to have a big game. For real, there is a formula to this (not anything like Tim O’Malley- but it’s legit). If Notre Dame puts an emphasis on running the ball this week (STOP LAUGHING) I can totally see Williams physically and emotionally carrying this team to victory.

Isaac Rochell. Much like Trevor Laws in 2007, Rochell won’t get a ton of national respect with the drop of his name, but he has been playing very well. With a Hurricane offensive line that is hurt and hurting (legit), Rochell will be even more important. The defense may rush only three for most of the game- and I’m betting Rochell still has a great game with quarterback pressure.

At the end of the day...

You have to wonder who needs this game more. With three losses, Miami is going on the road to play an out of conference game. They have nothing to win here outside of not losing. Notre Dame, on the other hand, is fighting for its postseason life and trying to fix itself in front of its home crowd. Who takes the punches and stands back up? Notre Dame 27, Miami 24.