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Trick Shot Wednesday: Dog Days Are (Almost) Over

(picture is unrelated, duh)

An entire LEGION of the Emperor's best troops awaits the Diamondbacks.
An entire LEGION of the Emperor's best troops awaits the Diamondbacks.
Matt Kartozian-USA TODAY Sports

With football season just around the corner, the long, arduous journey of the summer offseason is blessedly close to being done. And when I heard someone mention how the "dog days are almost over," I just happened to come up with some corresponding lyrics to motivate our boys in the backfield:

Run fast for Coach Kelly, run fast for Coach Alford
Run with your blockers, with your teammates and brothers
Leave all your foes and your tacklers behind
You can't let 'em catch you if you want to survive

And so on. Catchy, no? But let's be honest: you didn't come here to hear me make up half-baked lyrics about our harrumph of fullbacks. No, you're here because when you came to the front page of our humble little site, you saw stormtroopers and were like "lol wut" and now you want an explanation, right? Well, here it is:

Pfffft haha you guys think we actually need a reason to put Star Wars stuff on the front page? I mean, it's not like a site dedicated exclusively to Notre Dame sports gets many opportunities to do this, so you better believe we're taking full advantage of it. You're welcome.

Seriously though, the header photo was taken during the national anthem before the Arizona Diamondbacks' recent "Star Wars Day" promotion. Lord only knows why a non-Single-A team would ever do this...but then again, I suppose you can do whatever the heck you want when you're 46-61.

May your captioning skills be better than a stormtrooper's aim, and may the Force be with you! [High-five to all of you who instinctively responded, "And with your spirit!"]

These Aren't The Commenters We're Looking For

--Leading the way in our previous Miguel Cabrera-themed installment of TSW was occtipus, who stunned the scientific community and all its so-called "experts" with an ironclad theory of evolution:

--Next was yours truly with something that disgruntled fathers everywhere can probably relate to:

--And finally, we have eyerish9299292229992299 with a comment that may have incensed a few of our vertically-challenged commenters, but obviously got a laugh out of 5 tall people:

Poll Results

This has been Office Space Komedy Hour with First Down Moses! Honestly, it really says a lot about how patient you guys are when I'm scraping the barrel for any poll to tide us over to football season, yet hundreds dozens of you are still voting on 'em. God bless you guys.

Go Irish!